Cheering from the sidelines (via livestream)

For most of us the state of lockdown we’re living in has become normal. Masks, sanitizing, social distancing and staying home are just part of our way of life now. We’ve had to move past the sadness, regrets, frustration and tears, had to learn to find happiness in the small things again and above all  to hold those we love very close.

And so the days of this new normal have turned into weeks and months and eventually even a year. Sure, some days have been harder than others, and we’ve had to soothe sad children who miss birthday parties, play dates, and just hugging their friends, all the while hiding our own sadness because we miss those things too. Things which some days feel like they are lost, just fading memories of an era gone by.

For the most part we’re ok, we know that this virus is not going away anytime soon and we’ve had to make the best of each day we have.  But life always likes to throw a curveball or two, and so this week I find myself facing one. My daughter is having her first sports day, they have been practicing for weeks and she’s so excited. We have had such fun chatting about the upcoming baton relay, how nervous she is for the 100m race, and about my memories of my own sports days. Now obviously parents aren’t allowed to attend the sports day and so we will watch her very first sports day via livestream.

Although I’m grateful to have the opportunity to watch the event, it just isn’t the same as being there in person. And for some reason this small loss feels like such a big loss to me. Today I’m both angry and sad that we have to miss out. Today I know I will cry a little because I know that this is just one more thing that we will lose out on, and because I understand that it won’t be the last.

So this is a reminder that even though we acknowledge how blessed we are, it’s ok to still be sad at what we’re missing out on. Just as long as we remember to pick ourselves up, wipe away our tears, and that tomorrow will be a better day. For today, you better believe that even though I’m only watching online, I’ll still be cheering for my child, and hoping for a better future for us all when we can be there at sports days in person to cheer from the sidelines.