Leaning into love

Have you ever felt so much love that it’s almost too much? The kind of sit close, preferably on your lap all day, but if not that then have to be at least touching, kind of love?

To be loved so much can be all consuming, to be honest it can also become a little claustrophobic at times. By the end of the day I feel like isolating myself for just a few minutes so that I won’t have a child sitting on me, wanting to be held, or leaning into me. When I’ve pointed out to my daughter that she doesn’t have to actually sit on me all the time, she’s simply said ‘but I love you mom’ in reply. To her mind loving someone and being in close proximity doesn’t make sense, you must be touching!

When I do manage to sneak away for a few moments when husband gets home from work it won’t be long before the bedroom door will open and her smiling face will pop around and her question to me is always ‘what you doing mom?’ Quite hard to be honest and say ‘hiding from too much love.’ And so as she climbs onto the bed and snuggles into my lap I take pause to once again marvel at how much this little girl truly loves me. May I always live up to her expectations and prove to be deserving of her unflinching and deep affection for her mom. It makes me want to be the best mom I can be, so that she will always think of me so highly as she does now.

And when at bedtime the house breathes a sigh of relief as the two children finally drift off to sleep in their beds, this mom settles on the couch to enjoy a hot cup of tea. It’s then that the two Labradors come with wagging tails towards me for their special one on one time too. I guess it’s true what they say, a mom’s job is never done….climb onto my lap for a quick snuggle you two fur babies!

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